Not so silent

A six o'clock screening of Pandora's Box made for an early exit from work. I was running close to being late as I crossed the bridge from Embankment. I thought I'd avoid rumbling belly sounds during the film and bought a sandwich from EAT on South Bank to fill the gap. That's when I experienced that annoying walking whilst eating thing I had witnessed many 'no time to stop' people do. It started with removing package from bag, opening and balancing box, negotiating the removal of butty without losing any filling using a napkin, unfolding your second napkin to hold it (because you have just been in contact with a contaminated bar on the tube, inevitably sneezed and coughed upon) whilst managing a stubborn, large bag in a tenuous breeze with not one litter bin in site.

EAT- Would you like a bag?

W2N2- No thanks.

The film was great, accompanied by piano from scene to scene, quite extraordinary in this day and age. Then there was my friend's Bounty. He didn't have time to buy a sarny and do 'the walk' and instead brought his street chocolate into the pictures. Could he open it? Not without the cinema poleeece hearing him. their chair creaked to it's upright position any time there was a slight crackle. This happened three times at least and sent me into a silent, uncontrollable, shoulder shrugging bout of laughter. The funniest thing of all was the guy in front of us kept receiving a pinpoint torch beam into his face and lap every time it happened. The film ended…

Friend- What are they all clapping for?

W2N2- The guy playing the piano, he's over there in the spotlight.

Friend- F*ck off! There's no bloke playing the piano! Oh, so there is…

We clapped and made our way to see Shrag.